Tag Archives: early retirement

The Ending is the Best Part!

In his book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, Donald Miller said

“Humans are alive for the purpose of a journey, a kind of three-act structure. They are born and spend several years discovering themselves and the world, then plod through a long middle in which they are compelled to search for a mate and reproduce, and also create stability out of natural instability, and they find themselves at an ending that seems designed for reflection.”

Now, I don’t agree with calling the third act in life the  “ending” but I must say I am enjoying this third phase of life filled with re-flection, re-invention, and challenging generally accepted paradigms immensely!

Please have a read through some past posts (on the sidebar to the left) and let us know which ones most inspire you by commenting. We have recently relocated to the Florida Panhandle, have settled in with family, schools, etc., and are now  excited to commit more time to writing, sharing, and exploring via TJoR and CEOhm (note: CEOhm is currently only available on Facebook). We appreciate your feedback as we continue to grow together.

the-joy-of-retirement
The Blue Angels and Quiet Reflection!

Be Good. Do Good. Have Fun!

Why I LOVE my Superman T-Shirt in My Life2.0!

I LOVE my superman t-shirt. It reminds me of a childhood hero and it is so soft and comfortable. It is faded and it is fun. It makes me smile and makes others smile…

The Joy of Retirement…and I bought my favorite Superman T-shirt at Walmart for $5.00!

Even when I was working as a successful executive making beau cue bucks, I was never into designer clothes. I never cared about logos or names. It never took me more than 37 seconds to change into shorts and a t-shirt when I got home.

Now that I have pursued early retirement, I LIVE in shorts and flip-flops. And, obviously, I can wear my new Superman t-shirt whenever I want!

When someone sees me in my “S” they usually smile. They like the freedom I show to look confident, have some fun, and not take life too seriously. Every once in a while I see someone else wearing the t-shirt and we smile at each other knowingly.

“Walmart!” we say to one another with a grin.

As an early retiree enjoying a bit of coaching and consulting on the side, the last thing I care to spend money on are my daily clothes. I am going to do yard work in them, play in them, run around town in them. I am certainly not trying to impress anyone and I simply want a shirt that is clean, comfortable, and fun. I WEAR my clothes and I WEAR them out!

Walmart for $5.00 fits the bill!

A few years ago, I might have put my nose up at this shirt, it’s price, and the store where I purchased it. Now, I focus on value, simplicity, and comfort. I love the fact that it was only $5.00. You know what? If I look at a second hand shop I might even be able to find it for $2.50! Now THAT would be cool!!

I. AM. SUPERMAN!

I. AM. CEOhm!

My priorities are “Family, Fun, and Flexibility.”

My purpose is to “Be Good. Do Good. Have Fun!”

Share your thoughts… Share your favorite shirts! Share your values and purpose!

ceYoGA: Life Balance

As an ex-CEO in early retirement, I am pursuing several paths to strengthen skills that have laid dormant and neglected for the past two decades. One of these new pursuits is a training program to become a certified yoga teacher.

In The Circus of Life, yoga is a great complement to being a CEO. While one requires skills of juggling, multi-tasking, thinking of every impact and consequences; the other requires balance, singular focus, and training oneself to be fully present focused on every breath and movement.

I decided to pursue yoga training/certification as a way to do a deep dive into yoga and get even closer to my wife who has been on a yoga journey for the past 15 years. I also wanted this yoga teacher training as a way to commit to more regular exercise and getting fit – It has given me so much more.

My small weekday class at YogaFox is a wonderful and eclectic cross-section of people, good people. There is a fire/belly dancer juggling multiple priorities as she builds a business of teaching and managing entertainers; a young kick-fighter who is building so much confidence as she gets fit and, literally, kicks ass; a mother who is using yoga training as a way to bring some focus back to herself; a newly pregnant woman who is learning to manage her changing center of gravity every month; and myself, an ex-CEO who is taking the time to reflect, get re-grounded, and take better care of himself. Good people, each on a journey for different reasons and each enjoying each other’s company one week a month for six months.

Our teacher is highly educated in yoga and shares everything from the incredible and cleansing experiences of breathing, to the history and philosophy of yoga, to leading and assisting the asanas (postures), and the management of running a yoga studio. She brings humor into our class as we realize at the same time how beneficial it is to truly bring yoga into our daily life, and how challenging that can be in today’s world.

Yoga PhilosophyYesterday we studied and discussed the Yamas and Niyamas of yoga – the restrains and observations. Each yama and niyama was fascinating as we discussed it in depth. Each spoke to me as exactly what I need to focus on right now. Each had depth and applicability to every individual in every situation. And each was more relevant in today’s hectic, ego-centric, type A world, than ever before. A few examples:

YamasAhimsa (non-violence) – “My thoughts and actions are focused on loving awareness. I nurture and cherish myself and others. I am aware that the mind sometimes entertains thoughts of fear, anger, or selfishness but I do not get caught in these thoughts or act upon them. I accept, without judgement, any uncomfortable mental states. I release them and return to gentle, non-violent expressions of my energy.” – what a wonderful demonstration of how we can take the skills of meditation (quieting the mind and letting thoughts pass without judgement) into our daily lives… and what a challenge!

Asteya (Non-Stealing) – “I live in gratitude for all I have. I take and use only what is rightfully mine. I respect the possessions and talents of others and release my desires to own objects or talents I do not have. I appreciate my life as it is.”

Yoga NiyamaTapas (Austerity) – “I cultivate discipline. I have a realistic, balanced schedule for my seva (service), sadhana (practice), and personal needs. I am disciplined and also relaxed. I do not drain my energy by over effort and over work. My purpose is clear, my mind is decisive.”

Each yama or niyama can be very deep on its own, relating to our bodies, our minds, our actions, our environment, and our relationship with others. Each can be seen in the space of a moment, a day, or a lifetime. At the same time, when you look at the set of 10 yamas and niyamas we also see the balance between them. While Asteya (non-stealing) says we release our desire to own an object or talent we do not have, Tapas (austerity) says we bring daily discipline to work on ourselves. Thus, it is a balance of personal commitment and improvement without an unhealthy desire or focus on the outcome. Simply enjoy each moment, the journey, the practice… and by doing so, we will grow regardless.

Unknowingly, my yoga journey is quite yoga-esque. I did not sign up for yoga training because I have a strong desire to become a yoga instructor. I signed up to create a daily practice, to learn, and to gain something new I can share with my wife. And because of this, I am enjoying my training all the more – not thinking about ‘what will be on the test’ or ‘can I master teaching the class’ – simply appreciating the time together for one week a month with wonderful people, each on their own journey in life. Damn! I am starting to sound like a real yogi!

Each month when my yoga training week comes around I experience some resistance. “Oh no, there goes my whole week.” Then we take a few slow, deep breaths, and the world melts away and I can see it from a more distant perspective. At its best, yoga is calming and energizing; it is self-improving and non-judgemental; it is focused and mind expanding; it is priceless and I am glad to be on my journey with my instructor, my belly dancer, kick-fighter, mother, and mom-to-be.

… I can’t wait until next month!

What are you exploring along your life journey?!

Breaking the Paradox of Retirement

Some people pursue early retirement and realize they feel a twinge of guilt (I did). They may experience a loss of identity (I did); they may be searching for purpose, community, and structure (I did); they may be feeling fickle as they flirt with one interest or another (I did); and as they hear people say, “I could never retire…” they may wonder, have I done the right thing? Does this feel right to me? Why am I feeling guilty?! (I did — and that felt like a ridiculous paradox!).

I know I felt that twinge of guilt the other day while I was at a coaching seminar. I was re-exploring my personal purpose and values when I realized I was feeling guilty about what I deemed a non-committal attitude. It has been just over one year since I retired from the corporate world and I was starting to feel a bit guilty for not truly committing to a new path or big endeavor. Ironically, I was feeling guilty for enjoying the lack of stress, the new-found freedom, the sense of satisfaction of not flying, not wearing suits, not being tied to email…

I realized I had been defining myself but what I DIDN’T want to be (i.e. corporate) but I wasn’t driving much clarity on who I DID want to be (?). Historically, I needed to make a commitment to something big to help define me… but what was that to be? I had always had a big commitment, a big goal, at the center of my being — I had been feeling a void in its place.

Someone said, “Maybe you need to commit to not committing?” It was a good try but it didn’t satisfy me. It was still defining myself through a negative, what I would NOT commit to…

Turning this corner inspired me to dive in and pursue "The Circus of Life!"
Turning this corner inspired me to dive in and pursue “The Circus of Life!”

I let my eyes drift to  a picture in the corner, actually two pictures, and suddenly saw an enlightening representation of what I was experiencing in my life transformation. The picture on the right represented my corporate experience. While I had greatly enjoyed my corporate career, it was only one or two dimensional; while it had sparks of color, it wasn’t truly vibrant or unleashed…
When I looked at the picture to the left in contrast, I suddenly felt joy, fun, energetic, dynamic, creative, movement, anything goes. I got sucked into the picture and said, “I commit to THAT picture. I commit to pursuing The Circus of Life!”

Circus of Life - 3D AwesomeWhat does this commitment to “The Circus of Life” mean to me? It means I can fully commit to exploring life in all aspects:

  • new learnings, new experiences, new adventures, new hobbies…
  • no judgements, no regrets, no hesitations, no boundaries…
  • endless creativity, endless fun, endless possibilities, endless joy…

The simple paradigm shift suddenly solved the paradox I had been facing. That nagging sense of guilt in my early retirement from a lack of commitment was suddenly transformed into an energizing commitment that inspires me without constraint. To pursue “The Circus of Life” to its fullest and help others do so is a great commitment – perhaps a new life purpose. Along the way, I will explore new hobbies, new adventures, new humor, new stories, perhaps some other new commitments as I discover them — and I will paint my new picture of life. From now on, my life will always resemble a bit of a circus – some chaos, some balance, and a lot of fun – The Circus of Life. The truth is, it has always been a bit of a circus — it just took me looking in a new way to see it!

What does “The Circus of Life” mean to you?! In what way does it inspire you?

Lean into the Joy and Whole-heartedness of Life

Often times, therapists will say, “Lean into the discomfort” — at least, that is what I am told they say! Lean into the discomfort, embrace it, learn from it, and stretch yourself to see your blindspots.

Similarly, we must learn to “Lean into the Joy!” It is too common that when we are feeling true joy we make it a fleeting moment. We turn our back on it for any number of saboteurs: I am not worthy, I need to get back to work, I shouldn’t spend the time or money on this, I look foolish, and on and on.

I believe the purpose of life is to explore life; love, learn, and connect to others with joy.

Whole-Hearted Joy
Pursue Whole-Hearted Joy in Retirement

I believe the purpose of life is to explore life; love, learn, and connect to others with joy. For many of us, we must learn once again to lean in and explore joy, to explore life, since so much of our world has been filled and constrained by shame, a quest for certainty, pride, and even hatred as we go along what we believe is a set path.

A Researcher/Storyteller, Brené Brown, has been conducting research on the interwoven topics of shame, joy, and vulnerability and concluded that the key to joy and whole-heartedness is vulnerability. Exposing your emotions and being open to uncertainty – quite the opposite of what she expected when she looked to quantify and control these variables. In her books, including Daring Greatly,  she lays out 10 attributes we can cultivate to find whole-hearted living. Read through this list and score yourself – it is eye opening.

Whole-Hearted Living

  • Cultivating authenticity: Letting go of what people think
  • Cultivating self-compassion: Letting go of perfectionism
  • Cultivating a resilient spirit: Letting go of numbing and powerlessness
  • Cultivating gratitude and joy: Letting go of scarcity and fear of the dark
  • Cultivating intuition and trusting faith: Letting go of the need for certainty
  • Cultivating creativity: Letting go of comparison
  • Cultivating play and rest: Letting go of exhaustion as a status symbol and productivity as self-worth
  • Cultivating calm and stillness: Letting go of anxiety as a life style
  • Cultivating meaningful work: Letting go of self-doubt and “supposed to”
  • Cultivating laughter, song, and dance: Letting go of being cool and always in control

Looking back over the past 20 years, while I dedicated much of my life and identity to climbing the corporate ladder, I would score myself 1 or 2 out of 10 on this list. Now, as I am slowing down, being more mindful, and challenging cultural paradigms, I am improving and have a long way to go. How much does our American culture of consumerism influence our daily focus? Letting go of our Ego is an important first step and it takes daily practice.

What can you do to pursue whole-heartedness and joy? Can you think of a simple step to do today? Tomorrow? Everyday? Share in the comments below so you can help others lean in!

Here are a few simple ideas to get started:

  1. Print out the list from above and put it in a visible place: (here is a simple word document of the Whole Hearted Living List)
  2. Call or write a friend for no reason other than to re-connect (and LISTEN to them, truly LISTEN to them)!
  3. Take a new class on a topic that you know NOTHING about (yoga is a great equalizer)
  4. Watch or listen to speakers on the topic: Click here for a 20 minute Brene Brown TED Talk or, if you want to relax with a simple movie, here is Wayne Dyer’s “The Shift”.
  5. Start a journal to capture your stream of consciousness… it is amazing to see what comes out.

Share some of your thoughts or ideas here in the comment section. Lean Into Joy and Whole-Heartedness: we may not have had time in the morning, but now in the afternoon of our lives, IT. IS. TIME.

RV Adventures – The Prologue

One of the cornerstones of my first year in retirement will be taking the family on a summer-long RV adventure!  This is a key objective and illustrates the sense of freedom and new experiences that are possible, as a family, in early retirement.

Our children will be 8, 11 and 13 — this might be the last chance for a trip such as this — or it could be the first of many?!  We have rented RVs before yet this is a big jump and an important one.

First things first; we watched RV with Robin Williams!  From the moment they named their rig “The Big Rolling Turd” the kids were hooked.  They are excited to go and want to help plan the trip.

The first thing was considering what type of RV to get and where to purchase one.  We aren’t ready to commit to owning an RV for life.  Our intent is to own one for a year, use it on some weekends, some vacations and gear up for our summer adventure.  Then, most likely, we will sell it.  Thus, we want to get a good value so we are less likely to take a big loss on resale.  This pointed us toward private sellers instead of dealers.

Next, we had to think about what TYPE of RV.  Class C with a bunk above the driver, Class A with great amenities, or a Fifth Wheel — an amazing living area, at 1/4 the price, but you can’t enjoy the trailer while you drive.  This was a tough decision trying to balance cost with FUNctionality!  Our son summarized it — “but riding in the RV is half the fun on a long trip.”  We decided if we could find a Class A, with bunk beds, at the right price — we would jump in with both feet.

The Retirement Rig
The Joy of Retirement RV

Well, we found an RV — well cared for, well priced, and ready for sale before it had to be put in storage for the winter.  We picked up a Georgetown 350TS in Indiana.  The whole family flew from Florida to Indiana over Thanksgiving to drive the big rig back down to Florida on our first adventure.

B.O.B. and Rosie (2)

I then sold my Audi, bought a very basic Jeep and continued the preparations for the adventure.  If you want to see our aggressive summer itinerary or follow along on our adventure, subscribe at our blog:  www.BigRigAdventure.blogspot.com

The original plan was to sell the RV after the summer… but, so far we have been having a lot of fun.  Well, retirement is nothing if you can’t be flexible!!!

Not a bad view from the RV!
Retirement Rockstar Parking – not a bad view from the RV!

Where have I been? Finding Happiness!

It has been quite a while since my last post to The Joy of Retirement. Let me share why… for the past few months, I had been exploring a few business ventures and did not feel sincere writing about retirement with integrity while at the same time I was putting together pieces for a business.

I spoke with my very understanding business partner to say I need a FULL BREAK for a few more months before I contemplate any next steps even for a flexible work arrangement. She was very supportive and I am very excited for the next few months… you’ll see why.

B.O.B. and Rosie (2)During my first months of retirement, my wife and I have bought an RV, planning a 2 month family trip through national parks out west this summer (Big Rig Adventure). We had a wonderful Bar Mitzvah with our son, organized a big family cruise, helped improve our kids’ grades, I have done yoga, golf, basketball, swam, cooked, lost 15 pounds, and we have thrown the football with our kids more times than we have in their first 13 years!

During these months we have also challenged our paradigms on life priorities taking a refreshed look at consumer marketing, financial goals, and so much more.  Life is simple: Be Happy, Be Nice, and Enjoy Every Moment!

Thanks for letting me take a bit of time off but I am so glad to be back with all sincerity and integrity sharing my thoughts and tips for The Joy of Retirement.  I have a stack of notes, observations, and insights from my first 6 months and I look forward to us sharing and learning from each other. Add to that stack the insights I will get while on the 2 month family vacation in the RV and we have a fun conversation in the works!

For now, please enjoy this wonderful TED lecture from Shawn Achor. He breaks paradigms and shows how easy it can be to lead a happier life. Your happiness, in turn, can drive greater success, fulfillment, and even more happiness!

The video is too large to download directly onto this sight (or I currently lack the technical aptitude to do so) but you can use this link to see the video on YouTube:  Happiness  When you have 10 minutes, link through to watch it, then, come back to comment, share with others, and subscribe – let’s keep the conversation going at The Joy of Retirement!

Enjoy Life!

The CEO’s Epiphany

Retirement Epiphany at the Beach!

It was a difficult day.  The company I was running as CEO was being sold by a global corporation and, while I was involved, I was kept in the dark of many elements.  Basic ones like who would be the buyer?  What would be the purchase price?  How much more pressure would this put on my job and affect the people on my team?  What changes would the sale have on our corporate culture…?

Retirement planning starts by facing your true self
Contemplating OurLife2.0

In the midst of the divestiture, I took a mental health day to go to the beach with my wife for some time to think and talk things through…  There would be a new owner and most likely they would want me involved going forward.  I envisioned it — I would work even harder than I had already been (that was hard to imagine!) and 4-5 years later I would have the chance to make several million dollars (that was easier to imagine!) when the company would likely be sold again.  Then the obvious reality struck me — I was about to become even more consumed with my already 24/7 job commitment for another 4-5 years, have the chance to make a lot of money on the back end… JUST AS MY KIDS HAD LEFT FOR COLLEGE!  I would be largely absent for some of the most important years of their life.  My situation, my life, was completely backwards from the way I would want it.

This depressing epiphany was to become one of the most liberating days of my life as I realized that I was no longer happy on the path I had chosen more than 2 decades before.  Upon reflection, it made perfect sense.  I was still pursuing the goals I had set when I was 21 years old; yet, I had now been married for 15 years, had 3 children, and my job, which I loved, had grown to consume me.  I had changed but I had never revisited my career goals.

While I had been very successful at the corporate game, I decided it wasn’t a game I cared to play any longer.

I realized I needed to reset my priorities and pursue the life I wanted to aspire to NOW, not the one I had set my sights on when I was TWENTY-ONE.

When the company was sold, I had a chance to separate and I was completely ready to embrace it.  The epiphany on the beach had taken root as a core truth and I was ready to re-take the reigns to my life.  This is MyLife2.0.  I am taking at least 6-12 months to re-tire, re-calibrate, and re-find what drives my passion – so I can let that guide my next 22 years with a new paradigm on life.

I have become a passionate student of retirement because I have realized how little information there is on retirement beyond what the financial industry wants you to know (and, obviously, they have a clear bias).  While financials are important, they are only the start and there is so much more.  Much is dependent on re-visiting your priorities and life goals.  I believe the passionate pursuit of my re-tire-ment journey will help others as we redefine what retirement means in America.  It does not mean stopping anything and everything — it means pursuing what you WANT for the right reasons and ensuring you have some level of financial flexibility to do so.  We will redefine retirement together at The Joy of Retirement.

It has been less than one week since I left my company – so far I have started this website, my wife and I are doing yoga and learning guitar, I am helping my kids with homework, cooking, and planning an RV adventure for our family.  My goal in my re-tire-ment is to create a new path that is flexible, rewarding, and fun.  It seems to me, there are many paths to choose when one embraces and pursues the new paradigm of early retirement!

Stay tuned and share with others as we learn together!

Ready to Retire? or better yet: RE-TIRE?!

The truth is I don’t know if I’m retiring.

Every time I tell someone that I am retiring, they quickly tell me “You can’t retire!”,  “You are too young to retire!”,  “You have too much to give to retire!”   It’s as if every time I say “I’m retiring” they hear “I’m dying!”  In fact, in our society, retirement seems to be closely related to associations of death, instead of life!

Retirement Just Ahead
Planning the road ahead

I have been working for the same company for the past 22 years in increasingly challenging leadership roles and capacities.  I have worked in the U.S. and led businesses in Europe.  I was a Vice President of a large international corporation.  I was the CEO of a rapidly growing national company.  I managed acquisitions and divestitures for businesses and organizations.  I feel I have been successful and, fortunately, I have saved money; but I am only 46 years old, with three young children, will it be enough to last?  That is one of the fears of early retirement.

What I know is that after 22 years of an immersive work career, I want to live the rest of my life differently.  I want to spend time with my wife, kids, family and friends.  I want to spend time with myself for fitness and personal development.  I want to spend time to see how I can improve my community.  For now I will call that a sabbatical — if it makes people feel better.  However, I am pursuing a sabbatical which I hope to stretch out long term !

I may or may not be retiring right now; but I am going to

  • re-tire
  • re-tool
  • re-tread
  • re-new
  • re-calibrate
  • re-visit
  • re-kindle
  • re-fresh
  • re-juvenate
  • and re-assess life!

As much as some people think of retiring equating to death, I am looking at Retiring to Breathe New LifeMyLife2.0!

In today’s world this is the new and true meaning of retirement.  To re-visit life so you can live it on your own terms and not the terms of your corporation or the path you set when you were 21 years old.  To step back and re-focus on your priorities of today, your family’s health, personal development and new adventures.  This is the retirement I want to pursue today.  After all, why should we wait?

Welcome to The Joy of Retirement – it starts now!  Get ready for a great journey!

THE JOY OF RETIREMENT – Coming Soon! Help by sharing your ideas and interests now —

The Joy of Retirement is coming soon!  My intent is to build a community where people can explore retirement at any stage of life to find balance, purpose, community and share great stories of what is possible when we dare to think differently than the masses.

Beach Solo
Getting ready for MyLife2.0

I am a young ex-CEO with three kids.  I think it is incredibly exciting to explore what early retirement can be if you make life choices that bring greater balance to self and family, greater learning and development, and find a community of like-minded individuals who challenge the general paradigms to explore what is possible.

Don’t wait – get involved with The Joy of Retirement Now!  Let me know what you would be interested in learning or sharing with others by commenting below even as I work on the initial design and content of this exciting and needed site.